Hate is a strong word (but I really, really, really don't like you.)

I'm back after what can be considered an extended hiatus in the world of my writing in here. Some good stuff has gone on, and some crappy stuff has gone on. I'm going to start with the crappiest. I was going to write this all down last night, but I was really in such a state, I would have rambled and been all depressing and no one likes that. This is going to be a really, really long entry. Just so you know.

Despite trying (vaguely) to skew where I'm living, a lot of elements of this story will pretty much take you exactly to where I am, but whatever. I'm not especially concerned because, for one, it doesn't really matter, and for another, if I talk about any part of this story, people will know exactly what I'm talking about in several states. I mean, the NYTimes briefly covered this story, so it's not like it's a secret.

We recently had a highway patrolman killed while on duty. On Tuesday, in fact. He pulled this son-of-a-bitch over for a routine traffic stop, because the car and trailer the guy was dragging didn't have the proper plates. The 37-year-old guy, a 19-time convicted felon, was driving from Tennessee to Florida. Trooper Blanton pulled him over and tried to arrest him, and the guy freaked out and shot the trooper twice. Because. . .he had improper tags on his vehicles.

So then he runs. But not, as it turns out, before he searches the trooper for anything worth stealing and steals at least his weapon. He was tracked down by cops on a highway near where he'd shot the trooper and they found not only the trooper's gun in his car, but also drugs. The guy had convictions for armed burglary, assault with a weapon, carrying a concealed weapon, sale and possession of marijuana and escape. He was in jail in Florida from 1998 to 2005. While he was being chased by cops, during a, I believe, 16 to 19 minute chase, he fired two more shots at the officer chasing him. Luckily, he missed. So he's a lousy shot as well as a disgusting excuse for a human being.

Trooper Blanton was brought to a large city nearby's hospital, but he died.

Before I even get to the worst parts of this story, I would like to commend the Haddis County police force. If it would have been me, and I'd known he'd just shot one of my colleagues and then he shot at me? The bastard would have gotten a bullet right between the eyes. But they didn't use "violent force" to take the guy down. Now he's sitting in the Haddis County jail, waiting for. . .well, I hope he's waiting for someone to shoot him point-blank, but I guess he's actually waiting for a court date or something. They're holding him without bond, thank God.

So the worst part, as if it could get any worse. The trooper had been married for less than a year, and his wife, Michaela, had just had their first child, a son, seven weeks premature. The kid had just either opened his eyes or breathed on his own for the first time (or both. I'm not certain, it's just what I hear) the day his father was killed. Trooper Blanton died at the same hospital his wife and son were in.

At this point, I feel that I've told the story in a fairly newspaper-person sort of way (aside from the occasional cursing of the bastard's name). This doesn't reflect in any way how I feel about the situation.

Did I mention his age? He was 24. He and I were born the same year. It's always sad when someone dies (unless it's someone like that SOB that killed the trooper. He deserves a horrible, agonizing death), but 24-year-olds aren't supposed to die. It's not supposed to happen like that. And don't give me the whole, "Oh, everything happens for a reason, we never know how much time we have, blah blah blah." 24-year-olds are not. supposed. to die.

So I, as the editor of the obituaries, had to, obviously, get his obituary in. I was working on editing it and, halfway through, I had to take a break. I actually called my mom to talk to her to have something lighter to talk about, because, while I'm usually very good about separating myself from the obits, this one was hitting me really, really hard. And I didn't even know him.

It reminds me of last year, when the shootings went on at Virginia Tech. It freaked me out on a level I wasn't aware existed. It shook me. That's the only way to describe it. I was shaken. I sat in front of my TV and computer that day and just watched. I was experiencing this heightened state of fear, shock, sadness. . .all of it. It took me a week to pull myself out of that and, again, it didn't involve me. Sure, I knew people at VT, but I also knew they were fine. This is what this reminds me of, the way this makes me feel.

So I've been freaked out ever since I found out about this and, of course, being that I'm in the industry I'm in, I've heard about it constantly.

Cut to yesterday. I don't typically get e-mails of opinion in my inbox, because there's very little you can have an opinion on when it comes to weddings, births, school awards, and special events going on at the hospital. I got the following e-mail in my inbox that infuriated me almost to the point of tears. I'm going to post it exactly as I received it, typos and all, but I'll change a couple of names and stuff:

To whom it may concern,
As I read the Amesville and Whitaker paper today and see all the stories about Mr. Blanton's tragic death I have to wonder if anyone else died and who's missing them. It truly is a shame that anyone is killed at work doing the job they chose to do.My heart truly goes out to Mr. Blanton's family and I'm sure he will be missed. Going through the obituaries in todays paperI thought I would pick a random name and see how much coverage they recieved. The first name I cam to was Martha Baker. Ive never met Mrs. Baker nor did I attend Benjamin School. In 37 years as manager of the school cafeteria I have to wonder again as to how many lives she touched. That has to be an amazing number but where is that story ? I also see she was the chairperson for the Benjamin Community Cemetary Committee, she also had a pretty extensive family who I'm sure will miss her very much. Looking at the attached picture I can see she had a very warm smile and Im willing to bet her family will miss her homemade biscuits each Sunday as they get ready for church. How did someone as loved as Mrs. Baker's death not make the front page of your paper. Where is the story of how many students she touched, how many friends she made,how many people in her church have great things to say about her. I see she had a service at Weaver Funeral Home. Does that mean Benjamin School couldn't afford to rent the Civic Center for the service.Apparently Haddis County School system doesnt have as deep pockets as the North Carolina Highway Patrol.

Really? Really?

That infuriated me in a way that few things have in recent memory. Martha Baker died at 86. She worked in the Benjamin School cafeteria longer than Trooper Blanton was alive.

After getting permission from Vi to respond to the e-mail, I sent this:

As the Life Editor, I don't typically have much to do with the stories that run on the front page of The Peak, and I certainly don't have any say in what the Times puts on their front page. Despite this, I feel compelled to answer your e-mail.

Yes, it is always a sad occasion when someone dies. As the person here that deals with obituaries day in and day out, I'm more aware of that than most. However, I feel that at a certain point, while incredibly sad, it's not altogether surprising when someone dies. Death is a natural occurrence, especially as one grows older, and while the deceased leaves behind a host of family and friends that will miss them terribly, when the person in question is older, as Mrs. Baker was, loved ones, I'm sure, at some level, know that every day with the person is precious and they will not live forever.

I believe that there is a marked difference between sad and tragic. It is sad that Mrs. Baker passed away because, although I didn't know her, from the obituary provided, it seems she was a wonderful person. It is, however, tragic that Trooper Blanton was killed, because he was only 24 years old (an age, I'm sure you'll agree, doesn't often bring to mind thoughts of death), because he was a brand-new father, and because he was killed in the manner he was. I'm certain if Mrs. Baker had died because she had been shot twice while doing her job, she would have received the coverage you feel she should have. Had someone turned a gun on her during her time in the Benjamin School cafeteria, it most certainly would have been a front-page newsworthy event. Luckily, though, that wasn't the case, and she was given the opportunity to have a long, full life. Trooper Blanton was not given that option. He was killed in a hideous manner and, as I'm sure you're aware, untimely, premature, tragic deaths are often newsworthy.

I don't mind telling you that your e-mail infuriated me. A man who, by his very job description, put his life on the line daily, was killed unnecessarily by a convicted felon at the age of 24 (the age I, myself, happen to be turning this year), leaving behind a young family. He will never have the opportunity to work anywhere for 37 years as Mrs. Baker did. He will never know the son who will miss him, much less get the opportunity to meet any grandchildren or great-grandchildren he'll have as Mrs. Baker did. Mrs. Baker's children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren will have the memories of their dear mother, grandmother, and great-grandmother. Any of Trooper Blanton's descendants will not ever get to be that lucky.

That, sir, is why he got front page coverage all over North and South Carolina. And if you have a problem with the Haddis County School System not giving Mrs. Baker a large funeral at the lake(that's where Trooper Blanton's funeral will be - not at the Civic Center), I suggest you take it up with them. I have a feeling it has less to do with not having deep pockets as it does with a young man being taken far before his time.

I would also encourage you to submit this letter as a letter to the editor at for publication. Then you'll have the opportunity to voice your opinions to the entire county, and you can see if you get any responses that take the views you have.

As always, we here at The Peak thank you for your time in writing to us.

I'm hoping he writes back. I'd love if he wrote back.

Later yesterday, CousinCasey told me this woman downstairs said it was good for her that Trooper Blanton had been killed, because her husband had gotten a ticket from him earlier, and it's being dropped, because the trooper can't come to court.

People nauseate me. They really, truly do.

I've got more to say on the subject, but I feel this entry is long enough. And I've got a wedding to cover today.